i remember asking God to let me feel again...the feeling, not for me to lose how wonderful the feeling was when i had it. now, at this very moment...i feel so lucky and blessed that i feel like this again. and it was all for firdaus...my sunshine...at least for now even not for long...or won't be for long.
we rarely speak over the phone, he seems reluctant to pick up the call everytime...that suspicious but i don't really mind...well, why would i? he said, he won't cheat...so? yeah, i mean so what? so what if i buy or not? anyway...we are just in a stage of getting to know each other...not just more, but a little...little by little...i'm so secretive now...even my age.
come to think of it, i'd 35 next year...yeah, like months away...yes, still it just a number but biological number as well...
i'm happy firdaus is with me...i mean...as a friend now. even so, he didn't reply my sms so often or doesn't really wanna hang out together for social activities...i think, his friendster said he is naive and innocent...is quite right despite him trying to be naughty...
what? no...i'm not making stories...let me put his sms to me last night...sound 'so, you are curling in your bed already? can i join?'. yeah...indeed i was shocked...but still politician in me playing part...told him i was curling in my bed, no book just bed to conclude a hectic sunday. and for him joining, i said yeah...in his own bed. and...what he replied? he said...'i mean we both, together in one bed'. and yeah really...i start to think that he is no innocent after all.
trying to be naughty he is...but that's ok...he should be naughty...it's time for him to enjoy life and learn...
me...i still feeling afloat bout him...i save his photo as my wallpaper...in my hp. yeah right, wait someone will discover...but that's ok...i like him. so what?
yeah, this is the point where the start of the problem occured...or hopefully not.
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