..leave the land under the wind...

it has almost been a week i was in KK. spending time and money needless to say. and having so much of fun. i manage to submit one report, the most complicated ones and important one just before i left for KK.

i was great from the start, thank God. Alhamdulillah...the weather was fantastic! and only raining at night and the evening before we left for KL. the civilizations.

how i'm so speechless to say that...everything was so nice, was so fairy, was so damn great while staying in KK. Alhamdulillah nothing bitter, nothing at all...just a slight uncomfortable-ness. but that, i tried not to remember. only the most amazing thing lingered in my mind.

we start our first day, when we touched down in KK. checked in, rushed to pickup runner's pack for the marathon where...i felt so half heartedly bout running 21k the next morning. well, i ran nevertheless but only 10k and i believe, i did well. i ran the course all the way...i was grateful nothing bad happen...well not that bad since i've forgotten to wear socks. how i was forgotten?

i wore shoes in the cab...then only i knew that i didn't bring my running socks. ah, great! i only lost one toe nail and slower run as i've to adjust my feet every now and then. or i'll have a bloody feet by time i reached finishing point.

after that, i took the bus at pick up point back to hostel just happened that the bus stucked, yes...stucked under the fly over which eventually made us all walked or took another mean of transport. me, i was so lost...literally...until i found a police post and asked for direction. they said it was near...and made me walked around 20 more minutes to hostel and that was near...can't say much eh.

reached hostel and around 10am, rudi asked us out jalan-jalan KK tour. and so we went to bukit bendera, the observatory tower to see the whole town. and then from there we went straight to kinabalu park. i didn't realized it was so far from KK town. or may be it was far because of the road. we stopped at tamparuli, the suspension bridge and the proceed to pekan nabalu, again up on top of the observatory tower and witnessed mount kinabalu...s very clear.

then we went to timpohon of around 2,000m from sea level where it was the starting point to climb to mountain. after that we went to poring hot spring and i sweat like...nobody's business! we end our trip at kinabalu park when we stopped at kundasang and ranau. it was indeed nice place, cool places.

the next day...first thing in the morning, we got ready to our most dangerous activities of all...yeah rite. like it really was. white water rafting! and only knew that shera didn't actually knew that raft is a modern raft! she thought it was bamboo...oh puhlezzzz...i laughed at her thought of ideas like hell...it became a joke! how she was so naive.

kiulu river or tuaran river as known to the locals was grade 1-2 and sometime 3 when it rained the night before. the course was 9k with 15 rapids. i had great time, eventhough it wasn't so great to find out that i can't float in white water! even with the life jacket...nuh...how comes? never mind...the river guide was really helpful...he helped me when i drank how much water i couldn't count...and he was laughing.

he took me to the raft after we did body rafting and i couldn't get myself in. hahaha...that was hilarious. no, i wasn't jumped out of the raft even though there were fierce rapid along the way and we did hit all the rocks we could find...because it was fun and there where the fun lied.

i was shivering when we reached the ending point. where again i body rafted. yes, i was scared because the guide scared me when he said there were creatures under water. hey, seriously i can't figure myself more scare than in the water without knowing what were inside it!

after about one hour, oh yes...i didn't feel like leaving but heck we had to. we took our ride back to town...tired. and yeah...it wasn't really a serious pedalling since it was rapids remember. it flowed, like elevator!

on the way back we stopped by and bought buah tarap...some kind of jackfruit, well a smaller version and a bambangan sort of bachang kind of fruit. smell so strong! which finally it was given to rudi and the bambangan brough to office...great momentos.

the third day was even fabulous...remarkably fantastic and unforgettable. i went to the island park which till now, i felt like going back to the island...it was so nice, so peaceful and so, so...argh speechless...no word better described. the weather again was great. the first island was mamutik...yes the fishes were damn friendly. and the life guard too...he...hmm...tall dark and handsome! oh, how i bite my own tougue when i said this...he was so nice too. i think all people of sabah were really soft spoken and polite and nice. at least, during my stay.

at second island manukan, i was tired and lost my breath already. i didn't so snorkelling. just resting and having good time jalan-jalan along the beach. nice view. after that to sapi. i didn't want to miss anything here...so, i jumped to the sea again. and this nice guy who talked to my friend was so nice to bring further to the diving spot and see more under water. excited i was...and my guide was diving instructor. nice but...hmm...i didn't feel comfortable with him...as i said earlier. and i wanted to forget it. period.

the diving spot was greatly amazing! fantacy! fairy...everything was damn nice...yes, i wanted to spend more time there in the future. never mind if i turn tan...10 shades darker than i am now. for what great thing offered...i would jump for it a thousand times over!

forth day, i was suppose to do KK fun quest but due to missunderstanding...changed to wild cruise along klias river. i was told that it was crocodiles habitats and was advised not to play with water...however so, i won't play with the water as it was so black like charred!

yes, we saw probosis monkey a.k.a. bayau like 12x zoomed...yes they were shy creatures and hardly welcome human. and we saw few fireflies before we headed back as it started to rain. yeah...it just water and i liked it but it was KK we were talking about and 6pm was really dark. not willing to wait for any possibilities of rain to stop. it was around 60km from the town of KK but took me 2hr or so to reach the place. again, it was the road and the traffic!

i'd good fight with the driver, the guide when we had to follow two cars...was so slowed that we had no idea of why! yes, we could see there were nothing in front of them...of course, we were in the big van, a mini bus. we bet that i said, it must be men drivers whom bercinta and he bet it was lady drivers. turned out to be true, it was men!!! we had good laugh...

the next day was the day to travel back to KL...where i started to miss everything. everthing i enjoyed in KK. the people, the places, the environment, the weather, the beaches...the mountains, the crocker range...argh...even the traffic! i really loved sabah, especially KK. i'm loving it...

looking forward to be in KK again in the future!

report vs holiday of days

i've reports to submit and very much still under constructions! i'm literally panicking and stressful and wish all the luck in the world is for me. but it doesnt seems so. it seems more like obstacles along the way.

ok, it was my fault to have ym but it was invi for goodness sake. and my biggest problem, i can do much of work at home no matter how badly i wanted to. i just can't figure out why...i guess i've to try hard and force myself to basically do my work at home...occasionally.

for holiday packing was done, almost at least. only a few small things like sandals that i've decided not to buy. and telekung which i'm still not decided which one to bring. and my jawpaws that i just clean this morning =D

ok, that it...oh another one, still thinking which book to bring to KK. i dont know whether i'll have time for book or notebook that i'll bring together but...i will bring nonetheless...well, considering what ifs...yeah right!

i haven't really remind my boss that i'll be away for long. i'll have to produce these reports which still under construction to make my way to holiday and having good time without work at the back of my mind.

i don't train...for so long. i don't know if i could survive my half marathon. my best run. i don't even know if i'll ever run it! duh! it was scary thought that i'm not having enough training and wah...what an effort to fly all the way across the sea to run just not to run, wasn't it? so, i think i'll run. inshaAllah.

and typhoon...oh i'm so edgy bout the news. what's the weather like? would i be able to do what i've planned? would it be safe? oh...so many question in my mind. i really, really, really hope that thing will go fine as planned. amen.

i've alerted friends in KK that i'll be around for holiday. and looking forward for exciting holiday and expecting to have many beautiful photos!

..buying house and filling dreams...

i have dreams...many dreams...may be most of it associated with material. i want to have car, house, money, money and more money...and may be qualifications too.

but, i'm not that very fortunate...still, i'm grateful and feeling fortunate of what i have now...never one day i would want to prefer otherwise...hmm...may be for better. so i could pursue my other dreams...reading more books and writing books and gardening. well, mom and dad have plenty of space to garden anyway.

and i can open bookstore, or book for rent or library for that matter so, i could be in the athmosphere i love the most. and i can write and earn money...and become popular. yes, i love to be popular. better still, a best seller! ha ha, that's what we called dreams. keep dreaming and who knows it would come true one day? just work for it...

oh yeah, it was sometime knocked my mind that why is it matter when woman doesnt marries? well, i remember that the 'hukum' was initially harus...and that point i know i must check. it's in my mind that not being married is not 'haram'. or was it? wait. let me check again.

never mind, i can't find in the internet...i can't be bothered. too much info. i'll read from the book instead. think if i go to the curve now, is ok. or not? later...argh...again i put off thing...i'm total procratinator!

and...i'm forgetful. was it because i'm a single minded?

..dan yang kurik itu kundi...

it's been a week now after raya...yes it's still shawal...and still very much in holiday mood. and 3 reports are waiting to be submitted. wah, stressful.

hmm...i found new book store...not big but ok la...wide variety of fictions. and for 2 visits i've bought 3 books. it is really cheap, seriously. almost half of normal price! where can you find that? but still to hang out, borders is still the best and mph has wider choice.

ada banyak benda dalam kepala ni. report nak kena hantar, barang rumah nak kena beli, trip ke kk dah tak lama lagi, ah paling memening kan, larian yang hanya tinggal beberapa hari sahaja lagi...sedang latihan masih tak cukup. azam masih kuat, nak buat larian jauh besok...sekali ada rumah terbuka di rumah bos. ah, tidak boleh tidak...mesti kena menghadir kan diri.

..ramadhan yang mulia...

ramadhan sudah hampir ke penghujung...mlm ke 27 dah pun lepas...apa mungkin malam lebih baik daripada seribu malam tu milik kita? sedih...ramadhan akan berlalu sedikit masa lagi...ntah berjumpa ntah kan tidak ramadhan akan datang.

berjanji dan berazam dengan diri sendiri untuk bertarawikh penuh...tapi...nampak nya janji hanya tinggal janji...azam tidak dipenuhi. argh...begitu la...hingga 30 hari ramadhan hanya sempat menghabiskan 3 jusuk Quran. alangkah rugi nya...30 malam ramadhan...hanya kurang seminggu berteleku di tikar sembahyang...

sedang meminta pada yang Esa di bulan penuh rahmat lagi diberkati ini sepatutnya dilebih-lebih kan. meminta memang banyak...mungkin tak sepadan dengan ibadah pun tapi...bukan kah tempat meminta tu hanya pada-Nya? dan bukan kah Dia sahaja layak di minta-minta? hanya Dia yang maha besar...maha pemurah...minta hanya pada-Nya. dan sudah Dia katakan...minta pada Nya, Dia akan tunai kan.

begitu pun...ada hari yang mencabar...mencabar nafsu amarah...kasihan nenek. sudah seminggu tidak mendengar khabar berita. cerita nya cuma aku berkecil hati kerana...dilarang membeli barang rumah. sungguh kecil hati...tapi sebenar nya tak perlu berkecil hati...

kawan-kawan...seperti biasa...ada yang begitu menyenangkan hati...ada juga yang menguji kesabaran. apa pun itu kan cabaran nya...ilyas, adly yang sungguh-sungguh mengacau tenteram jiwa, megat hanya sebuah cerita tidak lengkap, awang...dia muncul semula, aris hilang ntah ke mana...biarkan, imran...satu virtual yang menyenangkan...dan sabri, yang aku tunggu tapi tak kunjung tiba...mungkin masa nya untuk lepas kan dia pergi...mula kan suatu yang baru, yang ada.

aku? di sini...masih mengagah diri mencari...apa mau ku. tapi, masih belum berjumpa...di mata di hati...kosong. tiada cahaya...masih meninta bahagia...tapi...bukan mudah. hati pernah hancur...hidup pernah goyah...luka sudah sembuh...ingatan masih teguh...mencari tonggak untuk meniti bahagia...menongkah arus, mencari titi kejayaan. sekali, bukan mudah di depan mata. usaha diiring doa...moga-moga cepat tiba...ke destinasi itu.

berjaya dan bahagia.

..mesmerized by books...

and more books...i read my first book on jeffrey archer and almost immediately i fall in...i was like mesmerized by his way of writing. so smooth...so intriguing...it was unputdownable...which captivate my attention toward many other books from other authors like charles dicken who always one of my all time favorite and new one, alexandre dumas. classic indeed.

actually...since my obsession with books is getting worse...i've lot of unread books on my shelves. when i look at it...i was always thinking...when would i read all these books? it was too many and still...i keep buying and no sign of stopping what i'm doing. it's like one theraphy which make me feel so good about myself. when i buy books...i felt relief...sort of satisfied.

it's expensive obsession, my running as well...i've to fork out many percentage of my household income...yeah right...and it's thousands for just a few months and that's for one, and only one bookstore and i buy from not just one. argh...it's expensive.

having to note this, i remember my last office attire shopping was like gazilion years ago...so as my running shoes. luckily, i didn't run or train that much so...having said that the need to buy new running shoes able to be put onhold. yeah...even the urge to buy is so intense, so intensed!

i missed my time to be able to shop again...may be because finance contraint...i don't feel like shopping...but well, not for books. that's why i said...it's just theraphy i can't ignore. i love to chill at bookstore...i love to be able to buy more books and love to curl in bed with good books and i really don't mind having sleepless night for amazing books like a prisoner of birth or my best friend's girl. i think it just worth it.

nevermind if i look almost zombie like...tired eyes, black circle around eyes...and having to spend more on supplement to help me 'enhance' my ability to 'alert' during office hour. never yet one time, i regret reading book dragged me wee hour and the next day means i'll be less alert.

actually...most of all, i'm worried. i'm worried bout my weight, my training during ramadhan and my financial stading right now. sigh. anyway...i'm praying that i'll be blessed during fasting month and my ibadah will be acceptable. amen.

..realizing life is hectic indeed...

my last 1 month and a half was hectic. with my work...and it was called deadline approaching...i cant just sit still...i run almost every part of the corner of the office to get my stuff done. done it was. and i must be thank Allah and be so grateful for His help and bless.

now that my daily life has back to normal or rather abnormal since i like busier me than nothing much to do me. i miss my KOTR 09 today...yeah, i wasn't have the courage, no guts to be truthful to run today. i hadn't enough traning for last couple of weeks. and worse, my calf injured when i moved my stuff out from old house.

that was the reason, but not the reason i couldnt run today as my calf has back to normal...but the reason for i didnt have my last minute training to 'fill' half empty 'jar' of my fitness capacity. thus, i know i could run good...you know being a 'perfectionist' and not be able to do thing unless everything is in good order wasnt feel good anyway.

and yeah, irfan loves me...well, he's my energetic and boisterous and magic and fantastic nephew i have...i love him too.

oh ok, i'm now reading dorothy koomson's my best friend's girl and i love it...i don't know...i just love to read anything on friendship...but not relationship...i can't seem to appreciate when it comes to books on husband, wifey...oh i didn't pick up such a book. not yet, not that i never tried but...i've no interest to read. might as well don't spend on thing won't do any good to me.

that's one...another is that. i'd like to write...a book...on my interest...but i ain't pretty sure what kind of fiction i'd write...but i'll try, i'll try it here....